AuthorTopic: Meanwhile back at the 'stead  (Read 196524 times)

Offline AJ

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Re: Meanwhile back at the 'stead ---New Years Resolutions
« Reply #1155 on: January 01, 2019, 04:35:41 AM »
Today is the last day of 2018. I spent it skiing.

It was a perfect bluebird powder day, here on one of the best powder skiing mountains on the planet. Big dump last night.....and today was a cold clear day. I'm glad that in our mid-sixties, my wife and I are still fit enough to strap on some skis and go up the mountain and ski down together.

I'm really glad we have each other. I live the life of a king, and she is the jewel in my crown.

This is a unique place, one of only three resorts in the country that still don't allow snowboarders. Nothing against people who snowboard, but those things ruin the snow, and I'm happy there's a place left that keeps them out.

Big buffet again tonight, only two days since the last one, but they have one every Saturday night in the ski season, and they traditionally also have one on New Years Eve.

It's a nice way to end what has been a mixed-bag of a year. I'm trying so hard now  to get myself to a position financial independence so that I will no longer be at the mercy of a system that is slowly coming apart. So that I and my family will have good choices.

It didn't go badly for me this year, I had some wins and no big losses. But with each passing year I'm more aware that I'm inexorably heading toward the end of my working life, and that I don't have unlimited time to get my shit together.

I'm planning for 2019 to be a good year for me. I intend to exercise discipline, make good decisions and take calculated risks that will help me attain my goals. With luck, and my luck is usually pretty good, I will get a little closer to being able to cash out and go anywhere I want to go and do anything I want to do.

I know it won't be all perfect. I pray God or whatever guiding force that guides this amazing universe....sees fit....to spare me and my family any tragedies...and if not, I pray he/she/it will help me get through whatever happens, with courage, dignity, and gratitude.

Life is about becoming who you really are....who you were meant to be. I feel like I'm very much on purpose now, and I feel no need to prove myself to anyone out there.  I am doing what I was meant to do...as best as I can do it.

I often read and hear people say that they have no regrets. I thinks that's bullshit....or maybe some people are just incapable of rigorous self-examination.

Me, I have a ton of regrets, and more than a little remorse for bad things I've done. But I am on the path. I will walk the path....with as much honor and right living as I can muster.

2019....bring it on. I'm as ready as I can be.

Good resolutions.  Best of luck with them in 2019.  It's going to be quite the roller coaster ride from here on in.

RE
I agree, good resolutions Eddie. Hope you have the luck you need. Me, I'm more worried about this year than last. The vulnerabilities of BAU seem to be going up every day. More blogs I read seem to be saying NTHE is becoming inevitable (not only McPherson, but Paul Beckwith, Albert Bates, etc.). Hope you stay above ground RE.
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Offline RE

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Re: Meanwhile back at the 'stead ---New Years Resolutions
« Reply #1156 on: January 01, 2019, 05:36:05 AM »
Hope you stay above ground RE.

I Endeavor to Perservere.


RE
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Offline Eddie

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Re: Meanwhile back at the 'stead
« Reply #1157 on: January 03, 2019, 07:28:15 AM »
So, like I told David on another thread, I've been looking at selling the stead. For several reasons, one of which is I'm considering a geographic cure to America's problems. I like Canada, from what I know of it, and I like Canadians. I like Australians too, but Canada looks better to me for a move if I do make one.

I just ran the numbers, and it looks like my RE investment in the stead after ten years of ownership would give me a 5.6 annualized return before taxes.

Not mind-blowing. But it might be better than losing money if I sell in five years. I don't see myself moving in less time than that in any case.....unless I hit the crypto lottery, but I'm liking my odds on that. We'll see.

But for anyone in my shoes, here's a strategy I'm thinking about. I have spoken to a decent agent, and in two emails he told me a lot up front about the local market, which he knows more about than I do . He gave me an honest estimate of what he thought the place was worth, which I appreciate.

For that kindness, I will use him if I list with an agent. But with 15,000 new jobs opening up locally with Apple (unless they change their mind when their stock tanks) I'm considering advertising in Silicon Valley on CL at a slightly higher price. I think that's reasonable, and I think it might be fruitful.

Apple is sitting on more cash that you can imagine, so they don't make decisions on fluctuations in stock prices ordinarily....but Intel once backed out of a similar deal here, so it could happen, I suppose.

I think I could net enough after taxes to buy a fairly nice property in CA, especially since Uncle Buck buys an extra 25% in Loonies these days.

It's a tough decision, because I think I will have the place paid off completely in five more years, and the taxes are next to nothing.

Got to sleep on this one for a while, and maybe pray on it, throw the I Ching........
What makes the desert beautiful is that somewhere it hides a well.

Offline Eddie

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Re: Meanwhile back at the 'stead
« Reply #1158 on: January 19, 2019, 09:44:46 AM »
The LCRA has drawn the lake down, so I need to go out and fix my broken boat lift while I can do it on dry land. I already ordered and got  some aluminum channel to splice the crossmember that broke when I let the sailboat take on water. Miscalculation....I thought the cover would keep the rain out (its a good cover) but it didn't and I left the drain plug in, and the several hundred extra pounds broke my el cheapo lift.

Now that the boat is back on the trailer, it needs to get done.

It looks like a straightforward repair, Just need to rig a saw to cut the channel properly (chop saw is way out at the stead, my usual problem...tools in one place, repair needed in another place...so I drive to get the right saw, or use something less appropriate. I actually have one of those metal choppers with a grinder blade out at the stead that I bought when I was fooling around with the gennies...that'll work with no blade change.

I'll splice the broken cross-bar with a couple of pieces of aluminum extrusion and some stainless through-bolts. If I were braver, I'd try to weld the aluminum. I'm just so out of practice, and I don't think it's really necessary. And I don't have a TIG welder. I have a MIG, with CO2. But by the time I got all my shit together and practiced enough to get the job done, I could have repaired the lift three times. I'll do it the easy way. If it looks weak, I can go back and add some beads later.

I'll have to drill some holes. I'll have to replace the wooden bunks too, that the boat actually sits on. They broke. I'll need a couple of 12 ft 2X6's....expensive now, and a pain in the ass to carry home in my short bed truck.

Weather here is in the 50's F, but the wind blew like stink all night, and I bet the Juniper pollen counts are off the charts. It's good really, it will start to bring an end to the 2 month allergy season that's exactly half-way finished...but a couple of days outdoors is probably going to kick my ass. I suffer mightily for days if I get a snootful of pollen.

Oh well.


« Last Edit: January 19, 2019, 11:24:24 AM by Eddie »
What makes the desert beautiful is that somewhere it hides a well.

Offline Eddie

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Re: Meanwhile back at the 'stead
« Reply #1159 on: January 19, 2019, 05:40:25 PM »
Blustery day, but sunny and productive. My splice job looks professional. Even though I got a late start. I blew off the tool run and managed to get it done with what I had on hand. Yes, you can cut eighth inch aluminum with a cheap-ass back saw and a plastic miter box...if you're patient.

I needed some bolts and got them from the old guy at the old local lake store, which used to be a gas station but isn't even selling gas anymore. But hardware? He had exactly what I needed, and the conversation was worth what I paid for the stuff.
« Last Edit: January 20, 2019, 05:32:27 AM by Eddie »
What makes the desert beautiful is that somewhere it hides a well.

Offline Eddie

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Re: Meanwhile back at the 'stead
« Reply #1160 on: January 21, 2019, 06:04:21 AM »
Yesterday time seemed to speed up, and even though I got an earlier start, I hadn't quite finished the new boat cradle when I broke a 3/8 inch drill bit and had to call it a day. It was getting late anyway. I am well on my way to having it done, although I won't be able to tell how well I've done until the water comes back up and I relaunch the sailboat. Hopefully, it'll be much improved over the prior set-up, which was sub-optimal.

I turned my eyes to the old dock, which is pretty sad...it's supported by ancient concrete posts that just sit on a rocky bottom. They've gotten way out of plumb, although the dock is solid enough. I guess I'll try to get the posts back where they belong and do some bracing before they raise the lake on the 23rd of next month. If the weather is good again I'll spend the night out there this coming weekend maybe, and try to get it finished.

On the drive home last night around 6 pm, the full moon was absolutely amazing, having risen very early, before dusk. A few wispy clouds served as a canvas for the moon  to paint with subtle color, and the effect was something that looked like it was painted in water colors by Van Gogh.....I reached for my cell phone to call my wife to to tell her, but the battery was dead, so I just drove across the rocky hill country back to Austin with one eye on the highway and the other on the slowly changing celestial spectacle unfolding to my east, looking out the driver's side window.

I wondered for a minute if the world might be about to end, or I might just die at the wheel, struck by a fatal dose of moonlight.

I turned in early, while the eclipse was still in progress, but the missus dragged me out of bed twice to come out in the front yard and look at it. It was the best one I can remember, off hand, I still gave up and passed out before it was complete, but I understand it was a true blood moon, the likes of which are seldom seen around here,


« Last Edit: January 21, 2019, 06:18:37 AM by Eddie »
What makes the desert beautiful is that somewhere it hides a well.

Offline Surly1

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Re: Meanwhile back at the 'stead
« Reply #1161 on: January 21, 2019, 06:18:30 AM »

On the drive home last night around 6 pm, the full moon was absolutely amazing, having risen very early, before dusk. A few wispy clouds served as a canvas for the moon  to paint with subtle color, and the effect was something that looked like it was painted in water colors by Van Gogh.....I reached for my cell phone to call my wife to to tell her, but the battery was dead, so I just drove across the rocky hill country back to Austin with one eye on the highway and the other on the slowly changing celestial spectacle unfolding to my east, looking out the driver's side window.

I wondered for a minute if the world might be about to end, or I might just die at the wheel, from a fatal dose of moonlight.

I turned in early, while the eclipse was still in progress, but the missus dragged me out of bed twice to come out in the front yard and look at it. It was the best one I can remember, off hand, I still gave up and passed out before it was complete, but I understand it was a true blood moon, the likes of which are seldom seen around here,



I checked it out at the beginning of the evening, then again around midnight on a cold night in Norfolk. My wife is an excited observer of these phenomena and encouraged me to go out and look around midnight. This is the closest pic I could find to what I saw, which was the moon's disc obscured to a crescent.



Definitely worth making the effort to see.

Also found this. Wish I'd had the gumption to shoot something like this:
"It is difficult to write a paradiso when all the superficial indications are that you ought to write an apocalypse." -Ezra Pound

Offline Eddie

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Re: Meanwhile back at the 'stead
« Reply #1162 on: February 03, 2019, 09:47:42 AM »
Yesterday I took the dogs and drove back out to the lake to work on the dock. It's warmed up, but it's cloudy and today there is still fog at 11 am, which is unusual here. So much moisture. Here, an el Nino winter means lots of rain, which is always welcome. It's those dry seasons that that can stack up for a decade that are the killers.

In a wet year, there is no place on earth any prettier than the Texas Hill Country.

I had good luck. I was able to finally get all the support posts under the old dock back in some semblance of plumb, and  started shimming and leveling the deck, which is not that old (maybe four years now?). I had help from one of adventurer daughter's boyfriends back then, and we re-decked it while the water was up (and it was early spring..the water was cold) ...so we didn't get the framing underneath square and plumb. It will look a whole lot better when I'm done.

The boat lift is done except for minor stuff that can wait until after the lake comes back up. I want to put some carpet on the bunks the boat will sit on, but I might have to adjust the new cradle, which I designed by measuring the trailer the boat is currently sitting on in the driveway..it might need some minor tweaking. By my eyeball measurements, the lift should drop lower in the water than it did, which will make getting the old Rhodes on and off of it much easier.

I have to take off a few deck planks and jack up one side of the dock so I can do some more shimming today...Then I need to figure out how to do some addition bracing to make the whole thing stronger. It's getting there. I'll be heading back out in a little while. The dogs will be happy, although they get bored and start hassling me and I occasionally have to stop and throw a stick for them to chase. Wylie doesn't mind the water temp, which is cool, but not really that cold. Yesterday i wore shorts and Chaco sandals, which make standing in the water a lot less troublesome.

I wouldn't want to go for a swim right now, but in many places, like Cali, these temps would be normal for summer, for a lot of lakes. Much warmer than some, like Tahoe, which is one of the coldest damn lakes I ever swam in.

Some people will spend today watching the American spectacle known as the Super Bowl. I will spend it in the solitary pursuit of maintaining an old wooden dock that most people would tear down, and hanging out with my dogs. To each his own. I hate football and everything it stands for, even though I know all the rules and can even get excited watching a good contest.  I'm a product of my Texas Friday Night toilet training. But it's another American stupidity, football.

Talented athletes risking almost certain brain damage for big bucks, and a beer-soaked bunch of fat-ass lazy people who sit on the couch and watch it all on a big screen TV , as they eat their way through giant bowls of tortilla chips and onion dip on the way to their next heart attack.

America, I cry for thee. You can't fix stupid.
« Last Edit: February 04, 2019, 08:30:38 AM by Eddie »
What makes the desert beautiful is that somewhere it hides a well.

Offline Nearingsfault

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Re: Meanwhile back at the 'stead
« Reply #1163 on: February 03, 2019, 11:24:02 AM »
Yesterday I took the dogs and drove back out to the lake to work on the dock. It's warmed up, but it's cloudy and today there is still fog at 11 am, which is unusual here. So much moisture. Here, an el Nino winter means lots of rain, which is always welcome. It's those dry season that that can stack up for a decade that are the killers.

In a wet year, there is no place on earth any prettier than the Texas Hill Country.

I had good luck. I was able to finally get all the support posts under the old dock back in some semblance of plumb, and  started shimming and leveling the deck, which is not that old (maybe four years now?). I had help from one of adventurer daughter's boyfriends back then, and we re-decked it while the water was up (and it was early spring..the water was cold) ...so we didn't get the framing underneath square and plumb. It will look a whole lot better when I'm done.

The boat lift is done except for minor stuff that can wait until after the lake comes back up. I want to put some carpet on the bunks the boat will sit on, but I might have to adjust the new cradle, which I designed by measuring the trailer the boat is currently sitting on in the driveway..it might need some minor tweaking. By my eyeball measurements, the lift should drop lower in the water than it did, which will make getting the old Rhodes on and off of it much easier.

I have to take off a few deck planks and jack up one side of the dock so I can do some more shimming today...Then I need to figure out how to do some addition bracing to make the whole thing stronger. It's getting there. I'll be heading back out in a little while. The dogs will be happy, although they get bored and start hassling me and I occasionally have to stop and throw a stick for them to chase. Wylie doesn't mind the water temp, which is cool, but not really that cold. Yesterday i wore shorts and Chaco sandals, which make standing in the water a lot less troublesome.

I wouldn't want to go for a swim right now, but in many places, like Cali, these temps would be normal for summer, for a lot of lakes. Much warmer than some, like Tahoe, which is one of the coldest damn lakes I ever swam in.

Some people will spend today watching the American spectacle known as the Super Bowl. I will spend it in the solitary pursuit of maintaining an old wooden dock that most people would tear down, and hanging out with my dogs. To each his own. I hate football and everything it stands for, even though I know all the rules and can even get excited watching a good contest.  I'm a product of my Texas Friday Night toilet training. But it's another American stupidity, football.

Talented athletes risking almost certain brain damage for big bucks, and a beer-soaked bunch of fat-ass lazy people who sit on the couch and watch it all on a big screen TV , as they eat their way through giant bowls of tortilla chips and onion dip on the way to their next heart attack.

America, I cry for thee. You can't fix stupid.
paste hockey over football and I'm right there with you... they play right into summer now. It's the height of stupid for a winter game.
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Offline AJ

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Re: Meanwhile back at the 'stead
« Reply #1164 on: February 03, 2019, 12:30:07 PM »
Yesterday I took the dogs and drove back out to the lake to work on the dock. It's warmed up, but it's cloudy and today there is still fog at 11 am, which is unusual here. So much moisture. Here, an el Nino winter means lots of rain, which is always welcome. It's those dry season that that can stack up for a decade that are the killers.

In a wet year, there is no place on earth any prettier than the Texas Hill Country.

I had good luck. I was able to finally get all the support posts under the old dock back in some semblance of plumb, and  started shimming and leveling the deck, which is not that old (maybe four years now?). I had help from one of adventurer daughter's boyfriends back then, and we re-decked it while the water was up (and it was early spring..the water was cold) ...so we didn't get the framing underneath square and plumb. It will look a whole lot better when I'm done.

The boat lift is done except for minor stuff that can wait until after the lake comes back up. I want to put some carpet on the bunks the boat will sit on, but I might have to adjust the new cradle, which I designed by measuring the trailer the boat is currently sitting on in the driveway..it might need some minor tweaking. By my eyeball measurements, the lift should drop lower in the water than it did, which will make getting the old Rhodes on and off of it much easier.

I have to take off a few deck planks and jack up one side of the dock so I can do some more shimming today...Then I need to figure out how to do some addition bracing to make the whole thing stronger. It's getting there. I'll be heading back out in a little while. The dogs will be happy, although they get bored and start hassling me and I occasionally have to stop and throw a stick for them to chase. Wylie doesn't mind the water temp, which is cool, but not really that cold. Yesterday i wore shorts and Chaco sandals, which make standing in the water a lot less troublesome.

I wouldn't want to go for a swim right now, but in many places, like Cali, these temps would be normal for summer, for a lot of lakes. Much warmer than some, like Tahoe, which is one of the coldest damn lakes I ever swam in.

Some people will spend today watching the American spectacle known as the Super Bowl. I will spend it in the solitary pursuit of maintaining an old wooden dock that most people would tear down, and hanging out with my dogs. To each his own. I hate football and everything it stands for, even though I know all the rules and can even get excited watching a good contest.  I'm a product of my Texas Friday Night toilet training. But it's another American stupidity, football.

Talented athletes risking almost certain brain damage for big bucks, and a beer-soaked bunch of fat-ass lazy people who sit on the couch and watch it all on a big screen TV , as they eat their way through giant bowls of tortilla chips and onion dip on the way to their next heart attack.

America, I cry for thee. You can't fix stupid.
paste hockey over football and I'm right there with you... they play right into summer now. It's the height of stupid for a winter game.

Amen, Amen, Amen!  :emthup: :emthup: :emthup:
If Marx had lived in the modern u.s.a. he would have changed his most famous maxim to: SPORTs are the opiate of the masses. Bread and circuses on the way to collapse, what can't be to love in the greatest country on Earth :icon_mrgreen:
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Offline RE

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Re: Meanwhile back at the 'stead
« Reply #1165 on: February 03, 2019, 12:42:06 PM »
If Marx had lived in the modern u.s.a. he would have changed his most famous maxim to: SPORTs are the opiate of the masses. Bread and circuses on the way to collapse, what can't be to love in the greatest country on Earth

The mark of a True Kollapsnik is he/she doe not know what teams are playing in the Superbowl.

Who is doing this show this year? ???

RE
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Offline cernunnos5

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Re: Meanwhile back at the 'stead
« Reply #1166 on: February 03, 2019, 07:00:59 PM »
True C5 story. I road in to the local bar on Quartez Island. Hokey was on big screens which was unusual. I asked if it was an important game. The waitress said, "the (blah blahs) are playing the (blah blahs) and if they win the (blah blahs) they go onto the (blah blah)".

In a little bit louder voice than was necessary, I said, "Well, I never did give a fuck about hockey". Every head in the bar turned... and I stood there smiling.

Later in the evening, one guy came up and said, "When me and my buddy heard what you said, we were going to kick the shit out of you... but then we took one look at you and realized that would go bad for us".

A proud canadian moment.

Offline Surly1

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Re: Meanwhile back at the 'stead
« Reply #1167 on: February 03, 2019, 08:06:13 PM »
True C5 story. I road in to the local bar on Quartez Island. Hokey was on big screens which was unusual. I asked if it was an important game. The waitress said, "the (blah blahs) are playing the (blah blahs) and if they win the (blah blahs) they go onto the (blah blah)".

In a little bit louder voice than was necessary, I said, "Well, I never did give a fuck about hockey". Every head in the bar turned... and I stood there smiling.

Later in the evening, one guy came up and said, "When me and my buddy heard what you said, we were going to kick the shit out of you... but then we took one look at you and realized that would go bad for us".

A proud canadian moment.

Well done.

Have seen some of those hockey fights. A lot of throwing down of gloves, sweater-grabbing and the occasional landed punch, broken up by a ref as soon as someone starts landing. As convincing as pro wrestling.
"It is difficult to write a paradiso when all the superficial indications are that you ought to write an apocalypse." -Ezra Pound

Offline K-Dog

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Re: Meanwhile back at the 'stead
« Reply #1168 on: February 03, 2019, 10:50:57 PM »
True C5 story. I road in to the local bar on Quartez Island. Hokey was on big screens which was unusual. I asked if it was an important game. The waitress said, "the (blah blahs) are playing the (blah blahs) and if they win the (blah blahs) they go onto the (blah blah)".

In a little bit louder voice than was necessary, I said, "Well, I never did give a fuck about hockey". Every head in the bar turned... and I stood there smiling.

Later in the evening, one guy came up and said, "When me and my buddy heard what you said, we were going to kick the shit out of you... but then we took one look at you and realized that would go bad for us".

A proud canadian moment.

I never gave a puck either!  And I'm from Minnesota originally.
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Offline Surly1

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The Super Bowl Can No Longer Entertain an Overstimulated Nation
« Reply #1169 on: February 04, 2019, 09:14:32 AM »
If Marx had lived in the modern u.s.a. he would have changed his most famous maxim to: SPORTs are the opiate of the masses. Bread and circuses on the way to collapse, what can't be to love in the greatest country on Earth

The mark of a True Kollapsnik is he/she doe not know what teams are playing in the Superbowl.

Who is doing this show this year? ???

RE

Herein the answers to your questions in the best article on yesterday's exercise in obligatory overkill that I've seen to date.
"Let the record show: it wasn’t racism or CTE that did it in, it was pure tedium. Football is dead, and ’twas boredom that killed the beast."

The Super Bowl Can No Longer Entertain an Overstimulated Nation
This year's Big Game was so uneventful that even the Patriots are likely struggling to be excited about it.


BY DAVE HOLMES

Pepsi Super Bowl LIII Halftime Show
GETTY IMAGESKEVIN WINTER

The Patriots just won Super Bowl LIII, and I can’t imagine a world in which even they themselves are excited about it. The game itself was a long, languorous, low-scoring snoozer that had America begging for adilly-dilly, and the pageantry surrounding it was like a dial tone turned all the the way up. I’ll put it this way: when the highlight of the Super Bowl is thirty near-silent seconds of Andy Warhol delicately dipping a plain Whopper into a small puddle of Heinz ketchup, this nation is in turmoil.

The night began pleasantly enough, with a performance of “God Bless America” by Chloe Multiplied By Halle, who are nominated for Best New Artist in next weekend’s Grammy awards. That awards ceremony will be aired by CBS, and hosted by Alicia Keys, who it appears will be doing comedy, because America has truly lost its way. Gladys Knight then sang “The Star-Spangled Banner,” and did not take a knee, because of course she did not take a knee, because clearly NFL snipers were stationed throughout the Mercedes-Benz Stadium. She did however do the “land of the freeEEEE” thing that all singers have been required by federal law to do since 1992.

The teams were coached by Bill Belichick, whose surname is a Croatian word that translates roughly to “sweatshirt villain,” and Sean McVay, who at 33 is the youngest coach in NFL history and also a braided leather belt that made a wish on the Super Blood Wolf Moon and became a Bachelorette contestant. The quarterbacks were Tom Brady, who America seems to think it needs to have a strong opinion about, and some guy for the Rams whose name I couldn’t tell you if you gave me until midnight. I am spinning my wheels in this paragraph because the actual football, reliably the least interesting part of any Super Bowl, was especially soporific tonight. No score at the end of the first quarter, only a field goal scored by the half, good news only for those who had 3-0 in their Super Bowl squares (which I did; drinks on me, well and draft only, limit 2, offer void in the continental United States).

Which brings us to the halftime show. From the start, Maroon 5 were a choice that were at once dull and controversial, due largely to their bold choice to record one and a half good albums and then start sounding like Satan’s girlfriend’s ringtone. I will call this performance a solid B+, because they rested heavily on Songs About Jane, and by the time they got to this decade’s vilest earworm “Moves Like Jagger,” Adam Levine had taken his shirt off, and America’s howls of tattoo-disapproval drowned the song out. Truly, the man is tagged up like a 1978 subway car, right down to the CALIFORNIA etched in a “Thug Life”-esque semi-circle over his navel. Imagine being Adam Levine and thinking you need to remind people you’re from Brentwood. Anyway, Travis Scott and Big Boi were there too, and everyone clearly signed a contract preventing them from doing anything interesting.

Commercial-wise, nothing blew the country’s hair back either. The first celebrity to show up in an ad after kickoff was Ken Jeong, currently squandering a career’s worth of goodwill on The Masked Singer. Gillette chose not to run its 90-second toxic-masculinity spot, because “maybe don’t bully or rape” is officially too harsh a message for America’s delicate young men. An exercise robot in a Michelob Ultra ad got sad because he couldn’t get drunk, forgetting that it is physically impossible to get drunk on Michelob Ultra. The Property Brothers gave us some raw star power. I actually laughed at the T-Mobile ads, largely because my own mother just accidentally texted me 34 Colombian flags.

The whole thing was a chore, and I think it’s because we as a nation are simply overstimulated. Who needs a hilarious Doritos ad when your president tells his own intelligence community to go back to school and misspells the world “their” in the same tweet? We are up to our necks in thrills, and it is aging us in dog years. We needed to be stultified, and we needed to do it together, as a nation, all at once. It’s all we have left.

The NFL may never recover, but be honest: we’ve been ready for football to be over for a minute now. Let the record show: it wasn’t racism or CTE that did it in, it was pure tedium. Football is dead, and ’twas boredom that killed the beast.

"It is difficult to write a paradiso when all the superficial indications are that you ought to write an apocalypse." -Ezra Pound

 

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